When a new year comes, there are two types of people. There are those that like to set New Year’s Resolutions and those that hate the whole concept. I have lived in both camps. Some years I have had a long list of things I plan to change, only to be discouraged when I stumble across that same list in February (in the bottom of a drawer) and see that I have missed the boat entirely. Other years I don’t plan anything concrete. Whether or not goal setting is something you plan on doing when the calendar changes, we all enjoy a fresh start.
There is a saying that motivates me to set goals in my life. It states simply, “If you aim at nothing, you will hit it every time”. With goal setting, we may not achieve our lofty goals, but the process can be useful in helping us aim higher and grow in the process. The problem is that we can get embittered if we don’t see progress with our goals and we can become cynical and stop setting goals. Whether you are interested in making changes in your diet, or exercise levels, or productivity at work, there are some useful tools you can use that can help you to follow through on changes. Dr. Donald Epstein describes the Triad of Change, which identifies 3 different methods for approaching change. Very often the reason we aren’t successful at following through on changes is that we aren’t using the method or style that fits with our own character, and we get frustrated.
In the Triad of Change, there are three types of personalities. There are those that lead by structure, those that lead by perception and those that lead by behaviour. I tend to lead by structure. If you are like me, it helps you to make something part of a routine. It is useful to make lists that you can check off.
Other people lead by behaviour. Making a “To Do” list will stress them out, but if they just start acting on what needs to get done, they will feel better. A friend of mine gets overwhelmed each Christmas time, he can’t imagine how he’ll get everything done and wallows in inactivity, ignoring all my helpful suggestions to “just make a list”. But he goes out and buys one person a Christmas present, and after that first purchase he’s started the ball rolling and his perception about the whole thing changes.
The third group lead by perception. How they feel about things will affect their ability to function in that situation. Lists and routine don’t help, and they won’t act until they have got their “perception” or feeling about the situation in the right place.
How does this work? Let’s take an example. Suppose an individual wants to get more exercise and “get in shape”. One who leads by structure will need to get a plan in their schedule. They need to join a gym or make sure they have a place to do their work out. It helps if they can plan exactly what will happen at each work out. In contrast, someone who leads by behaviour just needs to start exercising. They will figure out the plan later. The more they do it, they more they will want to do it. If someone leads by perception, they need to get their mind around working out. They need to spend time focusing on the benefits of working out, what they will feel like if they are “in shape”. They need to get some good music to play while they are working out.
The problem is that many of us naturally lead by one strategy, but we try and make changes by leading with a different strategy that is not our strength. It is no use for an individual who leads by perception to schedule all his work outs until he has his motivation and mindset where it needs to be. If that person is thinking, “I’m never going to get in shape, what’s the point?”, then he won’t be successful in his new work out program.
The secret is to lead with your strength, and support the style that is your next greatest strength. When we do this, the third element will change effortlessly. If I (who lead by structure) create my structure, and I support my behaviour to make it happen, (by working out with a buddy no matter how I feel at the time I am supposed to exercise), then my perception about working out will change naturally. If I am weakest at perception, I could spend (and waste) lots of energy trying to imagine that I will enjoy being in shape, but my perception won’t change until I have the structure and behaviour in place to make it happen. Conversely, if a person naturally leads by perception, and they can get the behaviour happening, then they will eventually follow through and create a structure that supports it without great effort. That same person will have a terrible time creating a structure to work out if they start with the scheduling details when that is not their strength.
Here is the greatest key to change. When you figure out what your strength is in the triad, spend time each day on it. If it is structure- spend time each day reviewing and updating your plan, making a list. If it is perception- spend time envisioning it- whether it is financial freedom or being healthier. (Use a little structure to put yourself in a location where you can do that- go for a walk in nature or be alone listening to inspiring music, etc ) If it is behaviour, make sure you spend time every day doing something that leads toward your goal- that action will lead to positive change.
The more we “know” ourselves, the better we may use our resources to make changes in our life. Somato Respiratory Integration (SRI – see video description on our website) is an exercise you can do at home to help you recognize where stress is stored in your body. Regular Network Chiropractic Care allows you to optimize your nervous system so you will function with peak performance. Taking care of “the machine” will give you the best results in performing an upgrade!
Start the new year off right and get a tune up for your nervous system. If you chose to set goals for the new year, whether they are health-related or not, we are here to support you with your changes!
We wish you a Happy (and Healthy) New Year from Shaughnessy Family Chiropractic.