On the 11th of this month, our nation has set aside a time for Remembrance – to honour the armed forces members who have died in the line of duty. We have done this since the end of World War 1 in 1918. Last month, we celebrated Thanksgiving, an opportunity to focus on gratitude and remember all that we are thankful for. In September we have Orange Shirt Day, a time to reflect on a tragic part of our history and to remember- as a nation and as individuals. Remembrance happens a lot in the autumn.
This past week I had the opportunity to share memories at the Celebration of Life for a dear friend that passed away in October from a brain tumour. He and I were classmates at chiropractic college, roommates in our single days and “best man” for each other’s weddings. When he called me after receiving his diagnosis 20 months ago, I immediately booked a trip to Vancouver the following month. Jane’s family is there and we had other reasons to visit, so I was able to spend time with him on 6 separate trips over this past year and a half. We spent lots of time reminiscing about old times.
Spanish philosopher, George Santayana, famously said, “Those that cannot learn from history are doomed to repeat it.” Remembering our past is an important, useful, and often healing practice. However, it should lead to reflection and changes if needed. Reflecting on those that sacrificed their lives for our democracy should lead us to defend the freedoms they fought for. Reflecting on gratitude at Thanksgiving should lead to action- a desire to serve or give back – to “pay it forward”. As we remember the children that were lost in residential schools, it can motivate us to oppose racism and intolerance- in our own lives and in the policies that govern us.
Last month I wrote about gratitude, and taking the “#aComplaintFreeWorld” challenge. (Click here to read article). I took the challenge myself and was doing well until this past week when I was speaking with a friend who brought up a certain political situation. This friend knew about the challenge and several minutes into the discussion she asked if perhaps I needed to move my elastic? Well played Carol! I need to remember that some topics don’t bring about the best in me.
Memories of emotion can be stored in our body. Our stomach can clench as we remember a stressful situation. On the other hand, we can re-experience the happiness of a situation by remembering the feelings in our body at that time. When I first became a father, I remember the feeling of my daughter’s face, nestled into the crook of my neck on that first night with all the feelings of joy that went along with it. As I imagine that feeling of warmth at my neck, I can experience those emotions that came with it.
As I said, we can use remembrance to make changes in our life and in our health. I can use the memories of my friend who just passed to remind me to live in the present and appreciate each day. I can use the memory of my sore and tight hips to stop sitting with bad posture as I get caught up in my new hobby (knitting socks!). You can use the memory of my “handsome” moustache to remind you of men’s health initiatives.
“The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” This quote is often misattributed to Albert Einstein, but it is actually from author Rita Mae Brown and there is no evidence that Einstein ever said those words. That doesn’t make them less true! This month, let’s not be “insane”, but remember the habits that don’t serve us well, and make changes! Let’s remember the habits that help us be the best version of ourselves, be they gratitude, making time for friends, or better posture(!) Let’s embrace those habits.